I spent thirteen years not posting on social media.

That sentence alone still feels heavy when I read it back, because it represents time, fear, pride, and identity all wrapped into one quiet decision repeated every day.

If you are an artist or creative of any kind, this blog post is going to be life changing for you. Okay, so I’ve been making original music since Easter, 2013. I started because I had begged my mom for months to buy me a microphone, a laptop, and music software. I was inspired by Mac Miller and wanted to be just like him, but Mom and I didn’t have a lot of extra cash lying around. So she kept telling me, promising me, that she would buy these things for me, and on Easter, almost 13 years ago, she did.

That moment wasn’t just about equipment. It was someone believing in me enough to sacrifice, and I didn’t fully understand that weight at the time.

I stumbled through some beats that summer and even tried my hand at singing and rapping. I talk a lot about not knowing when a big thing happened to me, or a change in my life that sparked the entire path I’m walking now, but this is one of those moments where I knew my life would change forever. From that first beat, I knew music was going to be one of the most important things in my life, and that it was going to be the foundation of who I am for the rest of my life.

Sometimes you do know when everything changes. Sometimes the universe taps you on the shoulder once, quietly, and waits to see if you’ll listen.

I want you to think back to 2013. Vine had just launched in January. Instagram was still in its infancy, having only been an app for a few years. SoundCloud was also fairly new. Independent musicians really didn’t exist to the extent that they do now. We still bought CDs at Target, and the Billboard Hot 100 was based solely on records sold, no streams. Spotify was only two years old in the United States at this point. There were still a handful of major artists who didn’t even put their music on streaming platforms.

It was a slower world, and because of that, it felt more honest. Or at least, that’s how it feels looking back.

The artists I followed and admired did it “the old fashioned way.” They dropped a record, toured with a microphone in their backpack, and slowly built an organic following across the country. My favorite, Mac Miller, would post goofy selfies on Instagram and make ridiculous tweets about Kanye West. He didn’t use social media to promote his music. It wasn’t that serious.

I internalized that model so deeply that I mistook it for a rule, instead of recognizing it as a moment in time.

The first rap shows I went to, they tossed out T-shirts and jewel case CDs to the crowd. Their show poster didn’t even include social media handles. So this was the world I started to create in. Everyone I saw achieve the things I aspired to did it this way. I’m ashamed to admit it, but it’s taken me thirteen years to realize this. This is the reason why, for my entire career, I’ve viewed social media as a chore rather than a necessity. The OGs I grew up on, they didn’t do it this way.

What I didn’t realize was that honoring the past doesn’t mean refusing the present.

But now I know, social media is absolutely necessary to my success.

That realization hurt my ego more than it hurt my workflow. I can’t have what I want in this life without it. And admitting that felt like surrender, until I realized it was actually alignment.

I used to see people from my home state of Minnesota and feel extremely jealous of their success. I used to see musicians who aren’t as original or talented as me build a following, and I would feel jealous. But recently, I was reading a book titled “The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can’t Stop Talking About” by Mel Robbins (we’re going to be talking about Mel a lot on this blog). Mel said something about feeling jealous that has changed my life forever:

Jealousy isn’t evil. It’s information - a tool. 

“Instead of blocking it, allow jealousy to guide you toward the things you want in life. You need to listen to it and use it as a springboard, a strategy, an inspiration, to PUSH you into action.”

That quote didn’t shame me. It exposed me.

See, the reason you feel jealous of someone is because, deep down, you know you are capable of doing the exact same things. Every time I saw a fellow artist garner more success than me, I knew that I wasn’t doing everything that I could do to achieve the same level of success. I knew that I wasn’t doing everything I was capable of, and I wasn’t actually putting in the reps and doing the work.

Not anymore.

Truth is painful, and clarity is freeing.

I used to think that if I posted an Instagram Reel and it got fifty views, everyone would point and laugh: “Look at this loser.” I let imaginary thoughts about others stop me from living my dream. The truth is, everyone is ultimately concerned only about themselves, especially on social media. No one cares how many likes or views I have. Seriously, no one cares. But I am letting the most important person in my life down by not posting and not chasing my dreams: ME.

Self-betrayal is far louder than public embarrassment.

I resisted social media because the people I idolized growing up didn’t need it to succeed. Then I let what I thought others thought about me stop me from even getting started. No one cares about your cringy selfie as much as you do. No one cares about your reel getting fifty views as much as you do. No one cares. But you do. Every day that you refuse to let “being jealous” point you in the right direction and envy push you to work harder, you’re letting yourself down.

Fear disguises itself as principle more often than we’d like to admit.

Post on social media today. Post on social media ten times today. Because at the end of today, you have to know that you did everything you could to achieve your dreams. You only get one short, crazy life. Make it count.

Not for likes. Not for validation. But so that one day you don’t look back and realize you were brave everywhere except where it mattered most.